Post Christmas Fun

I have been reluctant to post anything because I just feel at a loss for words. I think it is called Writer's Block. Although I am not really a writer, let's just pretend and call it that.

Ok, now that we have that out of the way, we have been having all sorts of crazy old fashioned fun around here. Take for instance, that we just removed the 3,452 ornaments from the tree and covered the kitchen table with them. Now we are going to see how long they will sit there before they pack themselves into the attic. This should be good because Morrie is about to eat lunch and has nowhere to eat it.

We started off the week by getting up early and going to work. Oh, wait, that was just me. Everyone else stayed tucked in their cozy warm beds. Then they got up late and met me at my office, saw the other 3 people who were working with me, and THEN we left and vacation started at exactly 12:31pm Monday afternoon. We took the kids out to lunch at a sports bar where we could all watch Arsenal beat Chelsea for the first time in...well...forever. Then we poked around the SAM gift shop because the line was waaaay to long to wait in for the actual museum part. Everything is pretty much on postcards and whatnot in the gift shop, so it was totally the same as walking around in the gallery.

We walked in the rain- to the kids horror- down to Pike Place and watched fresh donuts being made, fish being thrown and trinkets being sold. With Isabelle's new found love of cooking, we perused the shelves at Sur La Table. By "perused" I mean squeezed our way around the other 56 people in the tiny shop and looked at the shelves from 3 inches away as we tried to not block the walkways. It was fun. And by "fun" I mean people were in my personal bubble of space and I broke out in a cold sweat.

After a few movies we woke up and it was only Tuesday. The girls went shopping with Grandma and I dragged Morrie to the mall for some returns. He loved it. Really. We picked up the girls and needed some refreshments and of course that meant a trip to the bakery. Duuuuh. Donuts make the world go round.

Wednesday was the most exciting because I was able to play pinball!! We went bowling, ate greasy hamburgers and played pinball and more pinball in the arcade. Our standards are very low for what makes a good afternoon. We have raised our kids right.

"Wait!" you say, "where is the learning?". It's okay, we took them to the Museum of History and Industry yesterday and made them read all sorts of facts about our area. Isabelle had been begging to go, and because we encourage everything that I like, we went. Morrie was particularly interested in the "Purse and the Person" traveling exhibit regarding the history of the purse. I told him to pretend they were Eurpoean Carry-Alls, but he walked out faster than a greyhound chasing a rabbit. I think he had smelled the presence of a Hydroplane and had to go check it out.

I plan on watching tv for the next 72 hours, so please don't call. I will be watching very important reruns of old tv shows, movies on TBS that I have seen 53 times and Oprah's new network shows. I am verrrry excited about this. I will be watching from my room where we have installed FLEECE sheets because they are the best invention EVER made. The bed is always warm and ever so soft. We are still trying to kick the kids out and we told the cats to not throw up on them, but other than that it has been great.

Happy New Year!

Things I don't understand

I did not understand my 70 minute bus ride tonight. I sat in the middle part of an articulated bus, so I had no windows to look out and for the entire ride, had no idea where we were. I had no watch and no phone to give me any sense of where I was in the space/time continuum. It was very confusing. At one point I was worried I would get off the bus and be in (gulp), Kent.

I don't understand how last night my salsa tasted perfectly delicious and tonight it is lighting my mouth on fire. Alright...Who messed with the jar today??

I don't understand Physics. At all.

I don't understand how my daughter can find joy in baking and how she made me the most wonderful gluten free/dairy free cookies today. I don't understand it, but I sure as heck will take it. Holy Cow, they are fabulous. I am already making plans to eat dinner at her house when she is all grown up.

I don't understand where the sun went. I go to work when it is dark, and the bus ride home is also dark. What happened to daylight? I miss it.

I don't understand how I can still be this excited for Christmas as an adult. Only now, my excitement is about the gifts I am giving and not the dollhouse or Big Wheels I hope to unwrap.

My Macro-Economics class in college was just a big misunderstanding. I think I thought I was signing up for Masters of Art History or something.

I don't understand how I can love babies so much, but not have one in my immediate presence right NOW.

I don't understand why Morrie doesn't want to sleep under 3 down blankets a 2 fleece throws every night.

Finally, I don't understand why the cat is so mad at me. He tries to eat my dinner when I am not looking, meows to go out but runs away when I open the door and won't let anyone hold him for more than 4 seconds. I want a refund.

He is 7, do you think that is going to be a problem?

Lessons Learned

I have learned some valuable lessons recently. I learned that if you get all your shopping done early and things seem to be going really well, then you will definitely land in the emergency room with a case of pneumonia- thus thankful that the shopping is done- but wondering if you had left it, would you still end up sick?

I learned that little hands make cute iamges.


I learned that if your star is too heavy for the top of your tree, it will just fall right on OVER.

I learned that the cat and dog will sit together on the same couch, but the cat may not necessarily enjoy it as much as the dog.

I learned that giving birth to elves was the right thing to do.

But, they sure think everything is funny.

I learned that when I wanted to create a Christmas card and then realized that I failed to take many pictures of the girls together...ever...all year...that I would have to find some other image to represent the two of them.

Hmmm...I don't know if this is the right one...Isabelle doesn't usually wear hats.




I have also learned that Santa is sometimes peeking in on us from the least expected places.

Be good!

Things I am loving

Right now I am loving...

Christmas music that is on the radio 24 hours a day. Love. It.

The Kindle I didn't know we had. For a year. (funny story, that one)

Voss bottled water. I feel like a celebrity every time I take a drink. Where's my red carpet?

That my Christmas shopping is done.

And wrapped.

The Pioneer Woman's blog. Still loving it after finding it a year ago.

Sitting around a table with 6 other people last night shooting the breeze.

The fact that one of them was Adrian Hanauer and one was Kasey Keller wasn't too shabby either.

I know, right!

Taylor Swift's new album. Looove it.

The baby across the street. How could I NOT include that one?

Sleeping.

As a matter of fact, I think I am going to go take a nap right now.

Mudbath!

Some fall games are windy, some are rainy and some are muddy. This was one of the more muddy experiences we had this fall. This is right before the girl in red tripped Maria for no reason. It was probably because Maria is so darn cute.

This is Maria getting up from falling FLAT on her face. She is still watching the ball, that's my girl!

This is her watching the ball but thinking how dirty and wet and yucky her hands are. It is right before I yelled at her to wipe them on her shorts.

This is me wondering how in the holy tide I am going to get all that mud out of a white jersey.

Is that a left hook to my kids face???

Then she had to go in for goalie. Is this season almost over? I can't take this goalie business any longer.

What moron from the other team thought a pink game ball was the way to go??

This is what dried mud looks like. With a sucker in it's mouth.

Here are 2 clean people to rest your palette with.

Oh no! Mud is giving clean kid a hug!!!

I wrapped her in a plastic bag for the ride home.

No I didn't. That would be ridiculous.

I let her stick her head out.

Eleven!!

She had the week off of school AND it was her birthday. The fact that it started to snow as we walked out the door for her shopping day was just ICING on the 5th grader's cake.

Here she is opening the best present EVAR:

A jacket that matches Mom's Sounders jacket!! Thanks Uncle Loren!

What could this wonderful pink monstrocity be?? None other than her very own Archery Set. Don't worry, the wall only has one hole in it so far.

We topped off the night by having cupcakes from Trophy Cupcake. Sigh...

Oh, and this wasn't even her actual birthday!! Two days later we celebrated her day with ice, freezing temperatures and snow. Record lows that offset Morrie's birthday where we had a record high.

Maria got to do whatever she wanted on her birthday which meant cake and a glass of pop at 11am, movies, Mario Kart, coloring, more movies, archery, walking the dog in the snow, more cake... you get the general idea.

If only the snow would make cool shapes in the gutter...

I can't believe my baby is 11. How does stuff like this even happen in my universe?

Ouch! I need an adjustment!

Isabelle thinks I don't have enough to worry about and decided to up the number of headers she does per game.

#1: Heading it down (and getting a booty check from the other girl)


#2: Flicking her neck really fast results in heading to the left- and Mom getting whiplash.

#3: Hold on the player in front of you and use that leverage to head better. Mwaahahahaha.

#4: OMG header. That is when you head back a punt and mom puts the chiropractor on speed dial.

That is also when number 33 in grey stops to tell you "Nice Header".


Aaaaaaaand the ball goes back to the feet and Mom is once again able to breathe.

Thank you Isabelle.

Maria's New Best Friend, Chloe

Today I found myself in a very foreign environment. A place where I knew none of the vocabulary, none of the equipment, and not one clue as what was going on around me. Where is a soccer field when I need one?

This is where we were:

A horse barn! Stable? Hallway? Whatever.

At least one of us knew what was going on:

("Mom, pull it together!")

These are...saddles. I know THAT. Maria says that it is a tack room.

Ummm..Wait. So you are going to leave my child in here alone? With that huge animal? Maria says this is a Grooming Room and the horse is tied to cross ties. What do these words mean? What am I doing? What is she doing? Who's on first?

Those are really big muscles. Could she have picked any BIGGER of an animal to ride? Why didn't she just ask for Elephant lessons? I think I need a ventilator. I can't breathe.

I can't feel my legs. Is there a chair around here?

Now, this freaks me out. She has to clean the horse hooves.What if the horse kicks her? What if the horse leans over and lays down on her?

What if I stop breathing?

Yeah, that horse is big, but her instructor keeps saying that Chloe is a "just a Quarter Horse"
(Maria just told me to capitalize that because "it's a breed mom"). Just? What, is a Clydesdale next?

Does someone have a paper bag?

Gaaaaasp. Wheeze.

Okay, this was intense for me. The horse is jogging...going fast...wait. Let me get my horse thesaurus.

Trotting. The horse was trotting and Maria was...wait for it...posting. She had to put her hands on her head and lift her body out of the saddle and squeeze her legs and do all this in a rhythm of some kind. I was getting really sore just watching it all.

I saw another mom and was asking her some questions. After I asked where the pitch was and she stared blankly at me I told her I had no idea what I was doing here. She told me her daughter had been riding for a few years and then out of the blue offered Maria a pair of riding pants (I am sure there is a special word for them) that her daughter just outgrew.

These horse folks are soo nice!

Now if I can just find some smaller horses.

And a respirator.

Be still my heart: 2005

Back on the fall of 2005, we had a great friend take some family photos. I recently came across them and immediately started crying. Then I got out from the fetal position under the desk and began to wonder where did these little girls go??

Oh my. I am having a heart attack. Right now.

How can a child look like she has the sun beaming out of her eyes? Can I please have 10 minutes with this 5 year old girl?

These days -luckily- I don't have to work too hard to get her to snuggle with me. However, she is generally busy doing other grown up things, like listening to her i-pod. When did she get so ginormous? Quit it Maria!

Seriously? Those blue eyes are killing me. I just want to ask her a few questions so I can hear her voice again. Please?

Who is this girl now? I think my life just flashed before my eyes. I'm not old enough for that to happen. Where did the time go?

GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO BAAAACK!! I want them little again!

This sucks. I am getting back under the desk again.

I kind of think we still look the same. Maybe a few more wrinkles. Creases if you will. Watching those kids grow up so darn fast will do that to a person. You think Morrie will go get the neighbor's baby for me? I just want to hold her for a teeny tiny bit. Just until this ache in my heart eases up.

Maria Goes MAC

What happens on a lazy Sunday when Maria has free reign on a MAC photo booth? Lots. Happens (especially when Dad is zoned out watch Nascar and football).


She ponders the existence of Dads. The possibilities of practical jokes she could play. Endless. The silliness she could leave imprinted on this hard drive. Limitless.
Even the dog gets brought into it. Smile Annie!
This is what happened when Dad started to watch Nascar for the third hour.

Then she remembered how happy she is about it being November. She turns double ones this month. She is twice as excited about this.
What is worse than one unhappy Maria?


Two unhappy Maria's.

Then we texted her that Izzy had just won her game. Guess what the score was?
Who is this monkey kid of mine and where did she come from?
She is kinda fun to have around!